Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Dear Old Morehouse

Many of you know the feeling..................your SAT scores came in and you did well. It's finally time to pick a college so you're sitting on your bed, several fresh, crisp, white packages spread out before you. For what's really the first time in your life, mail is coming to the house with your name on it. Which one to open first? Hmm. Let's see, a brochure from Morehouse College; this sounds interesting.

Alright , so it's a well-respected school, lots of history, yadda yadda, decent business programs, career links to Wall Street; I could dig this. Oh wow, the grounds are well kept, buildings well maintained, sizable international student population, sounds good. Hmm, that's odd; I don't see any females in the pictures, and why are all the students black? Oh, it's a black school? Really? Well that's different. I'm not entirely sure that such a concept would work in TnT but okay, we'll run with it.

But seriously, where are all the girls? Let me give you a glimpse in to my academic history up to this point. St. Joseph BOYS r.c. school, Fatima College (for BOYS).......and now Morehouse College (for MEN). I see a trend developing here and I just might need to have a little heart to heart with the parents here.

You remember the bit about Morehouse College having well-kept grounds, nice, clean and well-maintained buildings? Well they weren't lying.......oh and by the way, that conversation with my folks didn't go too well obviously but I digress. Seriously though, the college's campus is decent enough but it's what the brochure didn't say that is the most striking. This campus is smack dab in the middle of the not your "The Fresh Prince of Belaire" hood........we're talking "Boys in the Hood" hood.............charming.

This information might have been useful while I was still sitting safely at home thumbing through brochures (fyi, Howard University in DC is just as hoody if not worse). Seriously though, you could cross the street from campus and get anything from used text books (wonder where those came from) to new rims for your ride as well as a varied assortment of "night time services." And who could forget gems like the friendly neighbourhood crackheads if not purely for their entertainment value?

Do you need a better visual? Take UWI (University of the West Indies for all my non-caribbeaners), St. Augustine campus and imagine it being in the Beetham Gardens. Right.

Okay Morehouse, let's attract the nation's top academic talent; here's an idea for a marketing pitch.........."Come to Morehouse, pursue your dreams.......or get shot."

Oh and the girls? Well there aren't any. They're all holed up next door in that dark fortress of doom fondly called Spelman College (Spelly for short), the girl school next door.......32 acres of pent up hormonal rage and feminism surrounded by 12 foot tall, wrought iron fencing (topped with spikes) and a mean disposition (aka Spelman PD).

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